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Thu, May 24, 2007 4:32 EDT

Diary of a Tired CTO

Topic: IT Organization Management

Current Rating: 5 Comments: 6

Dear Diary

I did the following things this month.

Met fourteen different IT vendors who gave an impressive high impact presentation on how their products and services can guarantee cost effective, cutting edge, optimized, and seamless, business value in tune with our strategic goals.

Rejected three vendors as their presentations were not in line with strategic customer oriented initiatives to suit next generation business clients.

Had a detailed discussion (for the 636th time) with all business stakeholders on how our latest strategic initiatives can totally align IT to suit business needs and deliver increasing business value with constant innovation in our journey to the Promised Land.

Attended sixteen best practice security seminars on how to accurately protect my company data from viruses, spyware, hackers, worms, phishers, trojans, malware, spammers, data center disasters, database errors, hurricanes, tornadoes, floods, data corruption, bomb attacks, snipers, power failures, wars, alien attacks, corporate frauds, information theft, lawsuits, bird flu, mad cow disease, political turmoil, human mistakes, computer errors, and a few other threats.

Some day I must organize all my 13945 best practice white papers by industry experts on how exactly to align my IT department to cut across traditional business lines, reduce TCO and elegantly simplify our business processes.

Renamed my slave sized technical support department to Strategic Enterprise Customer Orientation Services in order to strengthen brand equity, increase shareholder value, and improve customer satisfaction to progress towards a coherent service oriented organization.

Sent an umpteenth reminder to my team members to clearly define, document, organize and prepare accurate processes of their jobs and tasks to make it easy for outsourcing. Wonder why my team is not co-operating even when I am communicating so well.

Declined an invite to fifteen seminars on the strategic benefits of early adoption of new emerging technologies. Thought I would wait till they fully emerge from wherever they are emerging.

Added one new business jargon sentence "Key transition leader and catalyst for enhancing customer centric business landscapes" to make my resume look good.

Must stop pulling my hair for every network glitch and computer error. Wife and kids not happy with balding, short-tempered daddy.

------------
Thejendra BS is an IT manager & consultant for a software development firm in Bangalore, India. Starting as a field engineer in the previous century, he has more than 17 years experience in a wide range of roles in IT areas like Support, Helpdesk, DRP-BCP, Asset Management, IT Security, etc., and worked in

You do not have flash or javascript support.
Average (11 votes)
5
 
 
Thu, May 24, 2007 12:10 EDT
Posted by: Meridith Levinson
Rating:

Hilarious post! Great job!  Thanks for contributing!

 
Thu, May 24, 2007 15:44 EDT
Posted by: mtruxaw
Rating:

Hilarious for you, it wasn't your month...or maybe it was similar enough.

:-)

 
Thu, May 24, 2007 15:47 EDT
Posted by: Ravi Chitturi
Rating:

A bit of a humor indeed; albeit echos certain bits of sadness which we all can relate at times - Especially regarding our productivity in dealing 637th time with all business stakeholders on how our IT adds business value. Although the ball is in motion, I can't wait to live the times wherein IT will be viewed not just a cost center across the board.

Ravi Chitturi

 
Tue, May 29, 2007 20:03 EDT
Anonymous user
Posted by: r2d2
Rating:

Great Posting. It goes to show that CTO's and CIO's are universally an abused bunch, no matter what continent is your home base.

On the other hand, let us not forget that as you approach the "Promised Land" you may find out that one department's "Promised Land" is another's depiction of hell on earth! Remember that a promise should be misconstrued as a whim or passing fancy from a past or present executive...

You forgot the one or two weekly attempts by vendors to go around you by visiting the line of busness execs, CFO, COO and CEO. Don't forget your consultants, who keep whispering more projects for more services revenue to your line of business colleagues, your senior execs and your reports.

Make sure there are vendors you don't select and then there are vendors you ban from the property every week until they behave.

Everybody wants your time, your attention, your enthusiasm yet no one wants to give you anything in return save the trinkets and "Best Practices" books.

CIO....the Rodney Dangerfield executive position of modern business!

 
Thu, Jun 7, 2007 6:04 EDT
Anonymous user
Posted by: Abhilash
Rating:

A article which throws a clear picture of what a CTO / CIO is undergoing in his department.
Its like you need to select one solutions from N numbers with all sorts of constrains. rightly said....

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